Make a new trail

It's easier to stay out than get out.--Mark Twain

Behavior change is often a difficult thing. We have been following the same path for so long that we wear deep ruts in the paths of our lives. The deeper the ruts become, the harder it is to steer out of them. Our natural tendency is to stay in the rut. It takes a forceful and deliberate decision to steer out of them. But we are not in the clear. The ruts are still there and it is so easy to fall back into them.  It takes daily, intentional choices to stay on the new path.

In my own life, I have seen several areas where the ruts have been worn deep. Pornography was a very deep, dark rut for a long time. I found it nearly impossible to overcome the temptation to look at porn. Looking at porn became my normal.  Through prayer, being accountable to good friends, and the grace of God, I am on a new path, though I admit I still feel the wheels wanting to fall back in from time to time.  Anger toward my kids is another area where there are deep tracks.  In the past couple of years, I have begun to find a new way, but my default setting has been anger.  I have learned that I respond much better when I slow down before I respond to my kids' misbehavior. I am following a different trail.  Finally, poor eating has been a well-worn trail.  Many times over the years, I have fallen back into those deep ruts. I am again on a different trail but it is new for me again.

Making a new way is often difficult. We may need to steer out again and again, but the more often we do so, the easier it becomes. 

The righteous falls seven times and rises again.-Proverbs 24:16

Make the better choice.

How often do you weigh?

Most weight loss programs, including Weight Watchers, generally recommend weighing once a week. However, I was observing something last week on the Guys on a Diet board.  People I know who have been successful over the long haul weigh every day.  I started to look into a little bit. It seems daily weighing may not be a bad thing.  According to WebMD, daily weighing may help dieters lose weight twice as fast.  So, I put batteries back in.  Time to weigh daily again. 

Book Review: Mindless Eating

I just finished reading Brian Wansink's Mindless Eating (2010) for the second time.  Wansink is a food and consumer psychologist who seeks to understand why people eat the way that the do. In particular, he seems to be particularly interested in environmental variables. 

On the opening page are just these words, "The best diet is the one you don't know you are on." Wansink the proceeds to lay out small environmental changes that you can make that will affect how much you eat. 

Although there are numerous interesting studies described in this book, one of my favorites has to do with the size and shape of our dishes. People will eat more off of larger plates, even if they are told that they will.  People also drink less out of tall skinny glasses, even when they are told that they will. 

His concluding chapter deals with how to adjust our eating in small ways to lose slowly. He talks about the benefit of "food trade offs."  For example, "I can have chips if I don't have a morning snack." He talks about the benefit of making 3, but not more, small changes at a time because they will be barely noticeable.

In many ways, this is different from a lot of diet books. It will help you to look at eating in different ways, many of which you have not considered.  It is probably my favorite food-related book. 

Slow down

I was visiting again with one of our nutritionists today and she drove home the point about slow weight loss.  Even my goal of hitting 240 by my 40th birthday would be too ambitious based upon her suggestion. According to her suggestion, I should get to about 270.  I have a hard time not setting ambitious goals, yet I also want to develop healthy habits for a lifetime. It is interesting to follow the Weight Watchers board, where people are routinely upset if they do not lose 3+ pounds in a given week. I have been that guy. I probably still am in some dark recess, but I pray that it changes.

Despair

I wouldn't say I have been depressed over the past few years, but I have definitely been off. I have watched my weight creep up, pound by pound, day by day, for 3 years. There have been brief moments when the light cracked through the clouds, but those shafts of light were quickly snuffed out by new clouds.

As I continued to fall down, again and again, my sense of despair increased. I began to tell myself that I was successful for a season, but that it was apparently short-lived. Hope waned.

Recently, the light has been shining more brightly again. It seems that the cloud is lifting. I feel like I am in better control. I am feeling "on" again. 

10 myths debunked

HT: 22 Words

A survey of my colleagues

I am fortunate to work with a team of physicians, nutritionists, and exercise consultants who are most certainly in the know when it comes to weight loss. As I am blowing the dust off this blog, I thought it worthwhile to sample their expertise about what they think is important with regard to sustained weight loss.  Specifically, I asked them, "If you have 5 minutes, would you share with me what you think are the 3 most important factors in promoting weight loss, from what you have seen?"  

The most common theme that stood out was the importance of eating mindfully.  Karla recommended "avoiding mindless eating" and instead, eating in a way where you stop when you are satisfied, rather than full. Rhonda added to this by suggesting the importance of reducing distractions when you are eating. So, you may want to consider turning off the television, turning off your cellphone, and not eating while you are on the Internet. Another suggestion along the same lines was to intentionally slow down. Tracie has been suggesting that her patients eat with their non-dominant hand because it not only slows them down, it forces them to be more aware of their eating. 

Sticking to healthy eating basics was also well represented. You need to be aware of what you are eating.  Different foods have different nutritional values and a successful loser will remain diligent about this information, but as Tracie said, won't obsess about it. Ginny pointed to the themes identified by the National Weight Control Registry, which include, among other things, the continued monitoring of what you eat. Rhonda mentioned the importance of food records and hunger/satiety rating scales to aid in keeping track.  Further, Molly also suggested that successful people eat a lower fat diet, fill half their plates with non-starchy vegetables, and drink more water.  At the same time, she was careful to point out that "all foods need to fit", in other words, don't intentionally cut certain foods entirely from your lifestyle.  Avoiding certain foods leads to binges along the way, so find a way to make them a part of your life. Ginny said, "I often tell people not to do things for weight loss that they are not ready to do for the rest of their lives." 

Exercise was also a consistent theme.  Your exercise should be fun, and can even start out at 10-15 minutes per day, according to Molly. In fact, according to the information Ginny shared, about 90% of the successful maintainers in the NWCR exercise daily, often at about an hour per day.  Start somewhere and work your way up.  Even if you hit a wall in the beginning, work through it and keep on going. As Deb noted, you should "have a vision as well as specific short term goals." She added that accountability is often important in helping people to stay on track, so get a partner or someone you can check in with regularly. 

One of the areas I am most interested in, the eating environment, was mentioned.  Often, people are unaware of the way their environment affects their eating patterns.  Brian Wansink has done a lot of work looking at the psychology of eating and the work is frankly fascinating.  Tracie pointed out, and Wansink's research demonstrates, that using smaller plates, bowls and cups may help you to eat less.  She added that it is a good idea to keep tempting food out of the house and to keep it out of sight.

Finally, the emotional side of eating must be mentioned. Often, we develop a diet mentality and become frustrated when we don't lose quickly.  Molly recommended that people aim to lose 2 pounds per month (yeah, you read that correctly). Over a year, for many people this may lead to losing 10% of their weight.  She suggested that it is important to change your mindset to healthy eating rather than just weight loss.  Karla also drove home the point that people need to learn to deal with the emotional side of their eating, often by identifying alternative outlets. Rhonda suggested the work by Geneen Roth on emotional and compulsive eating as a resource. 

In summary, the people in the know aren't sharing anything new with you. They are sharing their combined decades of experience in helping people to lose weight and keep it off.  Be aware of what you eat. Eat Healthy. Exercise. Change your environment if you need to. Deal with your emotions. Think about what you are eating, but think about other stuff too.  When you start to slip, which you probably will, pick yourself up and start again.  

In retrospect

I enjoy reading history, though sometimes I would prefer not to read my own. Today, I went back and read over this blog from today back to it's inception. It tells the tale of a man desperate to lose weight, but apparently not desperate enough.

In 2006, I was at the top of my game. I had lost over 165 pounds. I was running. I was lifting weights. I was finally finishing school after too many years. I was about to embark on a big boy job. I felt exceptional. I was in control.

Then we moved and I began to let things slide, just a little bit at first. I wrote it off to the new job. I saw the expensive dinners as a part of making connections. But my weight crept up. A little bit at a time until I reached the 240s. For a time, I came out of my pizza-induced stupor and got my weight back down to a fairly trim 212 in 2008.  I kept at it for a while, but again, life came at me.

We began to pursue adoption in earnest. Stressor #1. In the midst of that process, my wife was diagnosed with breast cancer. Stressor #2. Some dear friends of ours chose to leave our community of faith, and not on good terms.  Stressor #3.

Excuses all, but I gave in to those excuses.  I took the reins off. In 3 short years, I gained 90 pounds. I did what I vowed I would never do and got back over 300 pounds, even if just for a week. I look back now on my previous stop-gap of 225 with longing.

If I were to continue gaining 30 pounds a year, by 2014 I would be back to my previous high weight of 370. By 2020--well, it's unthinkable.

I wish food weren't a comfort. I wish God had gifted me with self-control.

I wish.

But it is time to stop wishing and time to start doing.

240x40

A new year is upon us. A time for resolution, I suppose. But most resolutions are are cast by the wayside a week, or a month later. How to prevent that? I don't have an answer to that yet. I do know that a few days ago, I weighed in at 302.4.  That's right, I broke the 300 pound barrier again.

So, off to 240 pounds by my 40th birthday. I am down 5 so far.  Prayer's appreciated.