Observations from a binge

As a psychologist, my self-diagnosis is that I have a binge eating disorder.

According to the National Institute of Diabetes and Digestive and Kidney Diseases, here are the criteria:

1) Eat much more quickly than usual during binge episodes.
2) Eat until they are uncomfortably full.
3) Eat large amounts of food even when they are not really hungry.
4) Eat alone because they are embarrassed about the amount of food they eat.
5) Feel disgusted, depressed, or guilty after overeating.

That's me to a "T".

I am at the end (I pray) of a 7 day binge beginning on my birthday. I gained 19.2 pounds in those 7 days. Here are some observations:

• When I am eating well, I eat 3 meals and perhaps 1 snack--when bingeing, I eat my 3 meals but also eat much more between meals.
• When I am eating well, I eat a balance of whole grains, lean protein, fruits, vegetables, etc.--when bingeing, I eat a very high fat/high carbohydrate diet.
• When I am bingeing, I feel "icky." I wake up feeling hung-over. I have headaches and a general feeling of sluggishness.
• Every day during a binge, I wake up thinking "I am done with this" and then I begin to think "well, one more day would be fun" and I start to think about how I can get my next fix.
• When bingeing, I back off on my exercise, though I didn't stop this time (Thank God!).
• I eat a lot in private when I am bingeing. I look for excuses to sneak out of the house and go eat. Needless to say, Halloween is not a great time to be having a binge.
• When bingeing, I think about not much else other than food. I become aroused by it.
• I don't have to pee as much (I assume because of water retention).
• I have to poop a lot more (I assume because of more gross consumption).

I have to keep remembering I Corinthians 6:12 and live it! "Everything is permissible for me"—but not everything is beneficial. "Everything is permissible for me"—but I will not be mastered by anything.